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Big A** Gun

I have a daughter.  Soon she will be dating.  I have only one thing to say about that:  STAY AWAY FROM HER YOU SICK FRAKS!  And to encourage you to stay far FAR away from her, I will soon be purchasing this:

aa-12-combat-shotgun-frag-12-automaticThis is the AA-12 combat shotgun.  I don’t know who makes it (but I’ll soon find out) and I don’t know how much it costs (nor do I care).  I will be purchasing this sexy machine of death to mete out swift justice on any boy who dares to ask my daughter out.  I will be greeting him at the door with its fully automatic drum feeder locked and loaded with 20 sweet angels of death.  I will laugh at his swiftly expanding wet stain as I pump the first shell into the chamber.  I will be firing five rounds per second at the boy’s swiftly retreating ass using a combination of incendiary shells and fragmentory grenade shells.  This sweet new best friend has so little recoil that it can be fired one-handed by a strong man.  Have I mentioned that I’ve been working out?  A LOT?  Oh yea.  On second thought – go ahead.  Ask her out.  I dare ya.

via gizmag

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